Goan Hangover....

The trip to Goa has ended with countless harms and ruptures not on the body but on the minds of everyone. Planned to write every little thing in a scenic way, but couldn't yet gather all the energy to dip my mind in Goa again, and write a blog. So maybe, will take some more time to be back to senses.

 

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Dosti ...

Ek dost hai door ki duniya main kahi

Lekin usko dilse abtak main bhula bhi nahi

Yaad uski pal pal sataati hai jab

Yaaro yeh kahani shuru hoti hai tab

 

Jab mere liye who anjaan tha

Jab uske liye main benaam tha

Fir bhi ek dusre ko chidaya karte the

Hum ise dosti kehlaya karte the

 

Fir ek din hua chamatkaar

Hamari baatchit shuru hui beshumaar

We became best of friends kehne ki jarurat nahi

Sachche yaar ban gaye hum, yeh jaan lo sabhi

 

Chand lamho mein hum ho gaye ek

Aise dosti ke misaal honge anek

Par kisise dekhi nahi gayee yeh khushi

Hamari zindagi mein aa gayee ek ajeeb si khamoshi

 

Ek wakt tha jab katam nahi hoti thi baatein

Aur ek aaj hai, sirf bachi hai yaadein

Akele se reh gaye hai hum

Zindagi mein faila hai ajeeb sa ek gam

 

Ab tum kaha, hum kaha, kisiko nahi hai maalum

Judaa hona yehi hai zindagi ka kaanoon

Akele hi kaat rahe hai ab hum yeh safar

Mil hi jaoge ek din, sachche dost jo ho agar.

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False feelings

Sometimes it’s good that a particular thing happens. It brings to us the real facet of the fact of life and its originality. We as human beings, tend to believe/disbelieve a particular thing or a person according to our wish. But when a thing takes place, it shows us the real nature of the facet.

We love to live in pseudo feelings, irrespective of knowing the fact behind the bush. But somewhere we are afraid of accepting the fact. So we try to be happy by convincing themselves with the false feelings. But it is necessary to go beyond the line and know the real nature to possibly avoid any disaster in the long run.

We tend to consider some people / places as great and some as ungrateful without having any reason for it. But its only when these creatures stand true during delivering times, then they do become actual great. Scale things on these times and you will have a clear picture of what you perceive.

We tend to ignore many things in life until we realize their importance or the possible harm this ignorance would bring. And believe me, every ignorance returns. You try to end up a topic or a discussion just in a flick of a span without being accountable to anyone assuming that it is gone and would never return and would do no harm. But, my dear friend, you are so incorrect. Every thing returns – good or bad, is a mighty saying, and so very apt and true in case of human beings too.

My small suggestion would be clear up everything, clear your beliefs / disbeliefs, have a firm understanding and then let go off. Coz life is only once, what we did was only once, this experience is only once. It won’t repeat, so use it to the fullest possible gain of knowledge and experience. Clear every mistake, accept every lull, confess every hurt, extend every possible hand, love every creature. So that life could be at peace and harmony.

I Love Nature ....

There is a pleasure in the pathless woods;
There is a rapture on the lonely shore;
There is society, where none intrudes,
By the deep sea, and music in its roar;
I love not man the less, but Nature more ...
- Lord Byron

Living for you !!!

Watching the sun climb,

Every morning I wake up,

I stare at the tyrant with such a blue,

Then grab my chair and dream of you.

 

The life I want, it flashes me by,

As I see myself lost in your eyes,

The story starts from the day we met,

How I lost my senses since that date,

 

The journey begins when the church bells chimed,

And graced my home as my sweet bride,

You walked into my heart and gave me hope,

To live longer than I thought, as together older we grow,

 

Love was smooth as you made me feel sole,

For I had the gift of you that no one else did,

I waited and watched you rise from bed every morning,

So you open your eyes to me and hear me say

"I LOVE YOU", with all my soul.

 

Life moved on and it kept us busy,

But never too tiring to show our love,

Then one fine day God threw me a blessing,

When I learned that I'll have to half my love with another.

 

I named her Rachel, when she opened her eyes,

Kissed your forehead, for you brought her into my life.

Time flew past, I never realized,

When our baby girl had moved on in life,

 

It was something tough to believe,

But we had to let go for our job was done,

You looked even prettier as you grayed with me,

I held your hand and squeezed it with warmth,

As I was scared to lose you.

 

I took you for a walk in the woods,

To tell you to lay me in the willow before you,

So I don't have to live when you're not there,

We walked back to our old space slowly,

Dimmed the lights and rested by the fireside,

We looked at each other with such passion,

I could still see the captivating magic in your eyes,

I kissed your lips gently and dropped a tear,

For I knew that it is all coming to an end,

You pressed yourself against my chest so hard,

And I promised you that our love will never-last.

 

I wipe my tears as the tyrant sun dips,

Pull my chair back into the arms of darkness,

To struggle with my story-teller mind,

For this one tale seems so in reach.

Wish I could tell you all this, to your heart so pure,

To let you know, that everyday I am LIVING FOR YOU.

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Find myself again

Why do I feel so lonely, with people all around
They're reaching out to help me and
I know they really care.
I try to pretend that everything's okay,
but I know it's a lie and
I can't seem to find my way.
I feel so numb inside and
it's a terrible way to feel.
I can't even cry and
my heart won't seem to heal.
There's some one missing from my life
who can never be replaced.
I must go on living,
but my whole life has changed.
What does the future hold? I don't have a clue.
I feel so lost and lonely,
with nothing to look forward to.
Too many people need me
for me to just shut down,
but I feel like a robot,
I'm all locked up inside myself.
I know God has the key and
I'm sure he has a plan,
but when will I be free to find myself again?

Hindi music revolum(tion)ized

I was listening to Baawre Remix (OST Luck By Chance) while coming to office and just realized the leaps and bounds crossed by Hindi Music Industry. I mean seriously the level of music in Bollywood movies has grown to a more than stunning level.
Earlier we used to have the same kind of music – romantic and sad. Then with the advent of Yash Raj and Karan Johar came the mix of Punjabi music into Bollywood. But even that did not seem to gel well with the people's taste. Especially with those who had a fair enough idea of rap, trance and rock.
Then came the scintillating revolution by the entry of players like Atif, Vishal, Mohit and SEL (Shankar Ehsaan Loy). I truly owe today's Bollywood music to these maestros. And yeah, how can I forget the one and only AR Rehman. But over here, we will be talking about extra-ordinary talent and not of a-la crème persona like Rehman. He is comment less.
The way the music found its way in today's movies is truly sensational. I mean listen to the song stated above on an iPod on a more than average volume and you will second my thought. Decorously brilliant. The techno sounds introduced in this song reminds you of a TranceNation's trance ST.
May be it another masterpiece Nayan Tarse (OST Dev D) - introducing rock in Hindi movies. The initial attempt by Pritam in the movie Life in a Metro was truly inspiring for all vivid rock fans, and here's more to their platter.
I mean these guys have truly spent in some kind of effort to soothe our ears and get appreciated in the most positive manner ever. Thanks for introducing to the junta the true kind of rock, trance and techno music. Only thing I can say is Hindi music is undergoing a fast revolution with lots n lots yet to come. Enjoy.

Formality

Formality. What do you mean by formality? When you do a thing which you don't want to. When you say something you don't mean to. Formality can have various moods and reasons, and yeah, definitely various versions too.

One kind of formality is in my life. I would like to walk a thin line over here by terming the concept as 'formality' by saying that, I like to do this formality. Now, don't bounce back on me when I say I like it, coz it alone contradicts the basic definition of formality. But let's not get into technicalities what 'formality' actually means, yeah?

We both talk, but we don't communicate. We both chat, but we don't share. We are friends, but there's no friendship. We tell things but we seldom ask. We think about 1000 things, but we don't implement even a single thing. There's a growing space in between us. Though WE are alright, nothing seems to be alright. There's void space which is multiplying exponentially. We both can see each other, but we can't feel each other's presence.

Now here, you might think that we are holding up unnecessary, we are doing a mere 'formality', but I falsify this. Some things are forever. Some things never last. Some things never perish. Like when you take a birth, whatever organs you develop, good or bad (yes God forbid, but there are people whose birth is abnormal), you live with them until the end of your lifetime. Even after death, body perishes but soul lives on. Same way, when you get into a friendship or a relationship, its forever. No matter which tornado attacks you, you stay firm. You try to protect and shelter your loved ones, your family. Coz once you began the same friendship / relationship by saying or asking can we be friends? Now you are here to make total justice to your said words.

There are hell lot of things in this universe which go unexplained. Human brains are still not well versed enough to break the code. And that is from where comes 'belief'. When we don't know about things, we start to believe in things. And we need not do any 'formality' to say or do such things.

Same is the case with me. I still believe, one fine day everything will be alright. One day will rise which will be sunny, overcastting all the shadows and miseries from this world, from its people, from me. I still believe, blindly, in certain relationships, irrespective of whether they turned out to be good or bad, right or wrong, big or small, I believe that every relationship has a story. If you see it, it's your boon, if you don't, it's your belief. And we live in beliefs.

We, as normal human beings, tend to leave things when they are of no use. Pretty logical, but not much ethical according to me. The thing, fact, person who served us for all the time they were with us, we tend to leave them when they are of no use. Many relationships seek shelter to this fact. And I am happy that I don't do the same.

That is why I thought of writing this blog, so that I could testify practice what I preach. J

I know we both have been hurt. There were words which should not have been uttered. There were certain things which we should have understood. But having said that, just give it some time. And all will be alright. Here comes my belief again. I am happy that I am really able to devote 'that' time. I am being able to see things normalize. I am being able to see both the worlds settling down. Not for the matter of fact that we will be the same again. No. As aptly said, the cracks are always there. But at least I am making a sincere and genuine attempt to make all things alright.

I might have hurt him some time ago, he might have did the same, I might have uttered words which I shouldn't have, but at the same time I take power even to apologize to him that I was wrong. At the same time, I take guts to follow him that he needs time. At the same time, I am true to myself that I never thought anything bad for him. I am true to my inner being. May be things would not turn up, may be we are never the same again, and may be I have lost a beautiful friend. But I am happy I made an attempt. Infact several attempts. An attempt which was much beyond any 'formality', any accusation.

Moved on..

I just bloody hate these words – 'moved on'

May be they are for good, but it resembles so disrespect for the feelings, for the person and for everything invested in the matter.

Is it so easy to forget and move on? Does the time spent together means nothing? Do all the things said and done together have no meaning and existence?

How can a human being just forget what he as done / or what he has bore and just 'move on'?

May be this is the crying need of the hour. In our so called fast-paced lives, we don't have times for stopping, giving a second thought and cribbing.

Or may be its not that worth to pay a heed to or devote some time to analyze what happened, why did it happen and can things be sorted out.

I am not saying in particular about love affairs, but also in friendships, relationships, everywhere; ego has taken its stroll. They can so easily be washed away, so speedily be forgotten and so carelessly be 'moved on'.

At times they used to be the best of buddies, companions and now is the time when it doesn't even matter a bit that they decide to walk different paths. There were times when they were so crazy about each other that they needed one another at every move, every moment and now the time has rolled so harshly that all those moves, moments don't even find a place in a trash. Everything seems so meaningless. May be they have progressed as an individual, but they have certainly lost their character. There is a lull in their soul.

I just don't understand, why do people do not work out their so called issues?

Everything can be divided into understanding and misunderstanding. If there is understanding, no breeze of doubt or hurt will ever make you apart. If there is misunderstanding, it is your morale responsibility to clear it out. Because it can devastate everything in mean time.

So instead of 'moving on' why can't people just try to 'sort it out'? I personally think it will heal every wounded soul. And then life would be worthwhile.

THE PARADOX OF OUR TIMES - His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Got as a mail forward. So true....
We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers
Wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints
We spend more, but we have less
We have bigger houses, but smaller families
More conveniences, but less time
We have more degrees, but less sense
More knowledge, but less judgment
More experts, but more problems
More medicines, but less wellness
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often
We have learnt how to make a living, but not a life
We have added years to life, but not life to years
We've been all the way to the moon and back
But have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbour
We have conquered outer space, but not inner space
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted our soul
We've split the atom, but not our prejudice
We've higher incomes, but lower morals
We've become long on quantity but short on quality
These are the times of tall men, and short character
Steep profits, and shallow relationships
These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare
More leisure, but less fun
More kinds of food, but less nutrition
These are the days of two incomes, but more divorces
Of fancier houses, but broken homes
It is a time when there is much in the show window
And nothing in the stockroom

My love for you is my life

In the dead of the night,
As I woke up in cold sweat,
Your hand was what I groped for,
Your hug, for what I wept.

In the quiet of the morning,
As I got up bleary-eyed,
Your warmth was what I yearned for,
Your touch, for what I cried.

In the chill of a rainy day,
As the water splashed my pane,
To share a blanket, a book and tea,
With you, was all that I craved.

You may be far away from me,
You may not be mine,
My heart bleeds for you, my love,
For you, my soul does pine.

No matter what the future holds,
No matter where we go,
My love for you is my life,
And will always be so.

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HUMANE

I see him standing among the huge crowd with a proud heart but lonely memories.

The buzz of all the trains is so huge but is unfruitful to disturb him. Though he seems chilled out, there is a volcano running inside of him for he is to lose someone and something he has cherished all his life.

After years and years of love he is about to leave him to go far away to cherish his dreams, to materialize his thoughts.
But somewhere deep down the moment, he is alone. He is calm and composed from outside, but from within the heart he is all shouting to stop him, to tell him not to go away. But he does not. Coz he want him to live.

Years ago in childhood, his father expired at his teenage. He had a mere xxx Rs. note in his pocket when he came to Mumbai for earning a livelihood. Started with a mere salary of xxx bucks he started building his castle. The dream which he then had to nurture for years, unknowing of the fact whether his efforts and plans were going to fetch him something or not. He just kept chalking and walking. Coz he had no option to stop. He went on. Earning a livelihood from 3 sources at a time, Mumbai was a home for yet another person who had dreams in his eyes.

Days went, years rolled by, the progress was slow but yes, there was progress. Strolling down the almost empty lanes of andheri he returned to his so called home at late night. Those were the days when he actually lost his sleep. After sleeping for just 4-5 hrs, yet another Olympic day started for him. There was no time, no mood, no thought to get tired, to stop, to think back, to re-plan. All was just keep going, keep walking, hoping for the things to turn his way one fine day.

Probably that one fine day is this day. When he is about to leave the most beautiful person of his life. Things were like a love-hate relationship. Love coz of all the support, guidance, and affection for all these years. Hate for all the things restricted, said bad or scolds. All comes to an end at this moment when the parallel lines will be running to infinity, probably to never meet again.

No tear from his eye, coz he had a rock solid heart, but all broken into pieces from within, just thinking about what went wrong. Doubting himself whether his plan was wrong, whether he missed on something. All skeptical behind the mind, that old man let it all happen.

It's truly said, some things are better unsaid. Some things are better undone. Always let things go. If they were truly yours they will come back to you. And then is the win of life. Irrespective of the position you hold, money you earn, years you have lived. This single winning stroke of chance is worth every shot of life. All is worthwhile at this moment. I call this HUMANE.

THEY MAY CHANGE

Be understanding to your perceived enemies.
Be loyal to your friends.
Be strong enough to face the world each day.
Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.
Be generous to those who need your help.

Be frugal with that you need yourself.
Be wise enough to know that you do not know everything.
Be foolish enough to believe in miracles.
Be willing to share your joys.
Be willing to share the sorrows of others.

Be a leader when you see a path others have missed.
Be a follower when you are shrouded by the mists of uncertainty.
Be first to congratulate an opponent who succeeds.
Be last to criticize a colleague who fails.
Be sure where your next step will fall, so that you will not tumble.

Be sure of your final destination, in case you are going the wrong way.
Be loving to those who love you..
Be loving to those who do not love you; THEY MAY CHANGE.
Above all, Be yourself.
Just Be Yourself.

The 50 - 50 poem ....

Terrified Petrified Stupefied by you…
Sporadically dazzlingly stared by you

Let you not be bewildered by the charm
You look stunning; n there's no harm

To make you smile… let there be a face
Smile has so much an edge over the winning race

Chill down to dig up the real depiction
You may be baffled with the startling prediction

Settling in life is mere a formality
Never for any sake, lose your credibility

When things get undesirable and you get pissed
Lower your anger so that nothing is missed.

You are too charming a person at heart
People, who respect you, never make them apart

Destination is relative, never run behind it
All that matters is the journey, try to unwind it

Life unfolds many ways to make you whine
Show life there are more reasons for you to smile

World is beautiful and will continue to be
Humanity is birds in a cage and setting them free.

Because I LOVE YOU !!!

You come as a lightening
When it rains wherever I stand
As you are with me, it's warm and nice
It's like winter, a hand in hand

The heat of separation burns me
It's like summer in my heart
Now where is the reason for me to live?
When you are so much apart.

I'm a debtor to your dreams
I will surely be back to collect the debt
I'm a live reporter of your heart
I forget to speak when you arrest

Forgive me O divine lady
Should I make you speak?
First of all, I'm a sinner
But believe me, I am not a freak.

I'm a thief, who has stolen the poem from your heart,
I am stealing the memories with you,
This pain of mine,
I'm never gonna let you know
Because I LOVE YOU!!!!

Bachpana

Aaj jo dekha use cubicle mein
Hosh udd gaye mere dil ke circle mein
Usse haseen naa hai, naa hogi koi
Poore jahan – e – ulfat mein

Jab najaro se najare mil gayee
Dil garden garden ho gaya
Fir pata chala, ki woh khunnas de rahi hai,
To pure dil ka postmortem ho gaya.

Uski ek jhalak paane ke liye
Najaane kya kya karta tha,
SDB 3 1st floor se roj chadke
SDB3 3rd floor tak jaata tha.

Naa jaane kyu, usko dekhke
Ek darr sa lagta hai,
Par uski ek jhalak paane ke liye,
Ek darr - bahut hi choti keemat hai

Fir badi himmat jod kar,
Use maine mail kiye
Badle mein unhone ne,
Bade pyaar se khoob gaali diye.

Zindagi mein pehli baar
Kisiki gaaliya achchi lagee,
Mujhe apne pyaar ke saamne
Saari dor kachchi lagee…

Kahi dino tak chala,
Yeh gaaliyo wala silsilaa
Fir main ek natije par pahucha
Aur maine kiya ek faislaa

Socha kabhi nahi chedunga
Us naajuk si paree ko,
Aaakhir koi pareshan kaise kare,
Apne dil – e – husn mallika ko.

Fir maine pehli kasam khaayee,
Ki kabhi use mail ya message nahi karunga
Aur dusri kasam khaayee,
Ki pehli kasam kabhi nahi todunga.

Thode mahine beet gaye,
Aur mujeh apne upar naaz tha,
Kasame to unbroken thi,
Lekin dil mein uskaa hi saaz tha..

Fir ek din, mujhe woh
Bus mein dikh gayee
Main fir soch main pad gayaa
Aur meri dhadkane tej ho gayee

100 baar apni kasmo ke bare mein socha
She was in beautiful Indian wear
Fir socha, bhaad mein gayee kasmein
Aur message kiya, HAPPY JOURNEY, TAKE CARE.

Ab naa rahee who kasmein,
Na raha koi darr
Mere life mein aa chuka tha
Uske naam ka wallpaper.

Uske naam se hi jaise
Mujhe ishk ho gaya,
Usee ke khayalo mein
Main buri tarah kho gaya.

Fir ek haseen roz
Uska birthday aaya;
Dot 12 baje, use maine
Pyaara sa message kiya…

Zindagi mein pehli baar
Usne mujhe reply kiya
Uska message dekh kar
Main foola nahi samaayaa.

Message mein likha tha,
THANKS A LOT, BUT WHO ARE YOU?
Har baar aisi naa insaafi,
Sirf mere saath hi kyu ???

Bade jigar ke saath,
Maineuse reply bhejaa
Bhagwaan se kaha,
Agar tu hai, to mujhe jawaab de jaa

Bhagwaan to hai,
Lekin jawaab naa aayaa,
Fir mere tute huye dil ke aur tukde hoke
Who churr churr ho gaya…

Us din ek baat mujhe samajh aayee
Pyaar paane ka nahi, Khone ka naam hota hai..
Woh hasee to main khush, who royee to woh mere dukh.

Be-imtehaan mohabbat
Karte they unse hum,
Socha chahe kuch bhi ho jaye,
Yeh pyaar kabhi na hoga kam.

Zindagi mein pehli baar
Mujhe koi itni achchi lagi thi
Ek due - shaadi ladki
Mujhe innocent si bachchi lagi thi [:-)] …………

Adm(eye)ration

When you sleep
Do you look at the mirror?
Thank God you don't
It's a terrific horror

Even then I love to stare at your eyes
They seem to me like clear blue skies
Wherein you seem to hide yourself from the space
But I get a look of your entire world from your face

Then your hair seem to hide the beautiful mystery
If I could, I would make your hair a history
And you open your eyes to my despair
Then somehow manage to steal my stare

You find me from the mirror in front of you
Just to know that I m lost in your eyes deep blue
The views of phase 2 arrive
And the beautiful story seems to deprive

Thought that I would note this as a rhyme
And here is my attempt not so fine.

One Move

One move can destroy you
The one which is wrong
To heal such wounds is very hard
And will take quite a long

Think hard what you do
Should not wreck a life
A suicide is written by its conclusions
A life ended by butcher’s knife

Something similar is what I’ve done
Never thought of the consequences so bad
It has placed me in a position
I wish I never been had

Only one move it takes
To put you in place
Right or wrong
You just need solace

Now I stand all alone
Pondering on my deeds
In this world
Where I seek sentence within weeds

How Can I Be Lost ???

How could he know
This new dawn's light Would change his life forever?
Set sail to sea
But pulled off course By the light of golden treasure
Was he the one causing pain
With his careless dreaming?
Been afraid Always afraid Of the things he's feeling
He could just be gone
He would just sail on He'll just sail on
How can I be lost, If I've got nowhere to go?
Search for seas of gold How come it's got so cold?
How can I be lost? In remembrance I relive
And how can I blame you When it's me I can't forgive?
These days drift on Inside a fog
It's thick and suffocating
His sinking life Outside it's hell
Inside, intoxication
He's run aground Like his life
Water much too shallow
Slipping fast Down with his ship
Fading in the shadows
Now a castaway They've all gone away
They've gone away
How can I be lost If I've got nowhere to go?
Search for seas of gold How come it's got so cold?
How can I be lost? In remembrance I relive
And how can I blame you When it's me I can't forgive?
When it's me I can't forgive?

-Metallica

My Pride Is like a Castle in the Sand

My pride is like a castle in the sand
Washed away by hope and need and pain.
You left me holding someone else's hand,

And now you stand alone in midnight rain.
I want you back again if you want me;
I'm ready to rebuild what we have lost,

As the owner of a dream swept out to sea
Builds back upon the beach despite the cost.

My love for you is stronger than the waves,
Stronger than the doubts that we may share;

If you will say the word that my heart craves,
I'll find some flowered field and take you there.

And Time will sweep this interlude away;
It will barely be a memory someday.