I am totally freaked out. When you are out of time, you are just OUT OF TIME. Then you can't even find time to hog, to watch, to live to do anything else. All you do is code and keep on coding. The vicious cycle of work, review and rework starts and takes it stroll over you. You are completely bemusedin it.
Same is my conditions, I am working for more than required hours now a days from past 3 weeks and that is keeping me away from my blogs. Today anyway I thought of stealing at least some time to write a short one.
IPL has started, but by the time, I reach home all the matches are over. Thanks to EPL that keeps me amused in the wee hours too. Life is asking much more to work than for me to demand. That keeps even the simplest and smallest of my chores in pending state.
Seriously looking forward to the extra long weekend when I could possibly breathe in a little life in myself.
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Never ever, EVER get yourself into a situation where you need to say sorry to someone. I mean, who knows it better than me that there can be zillion of times in your life when you desperately need to say a sorry to someone for the things you did which probably you shouldn't have. I have done it more than actually necessary. And today I realize I have done a grave mistake.
I do not say, never say sorry to anyone, say it when someone gets pushed by you in a crowded place (it's a pleasant gesture), or say it when someone tells you a bad news. But never say it for your mistakes, rather never owe it. Wait, I mean never ever commit such mistakes that you need to say a sorry. Because it's after effects are disastrous. Every time I arrive at a point to say a sorry, I lose all the zeal, enthusiasm in me and start becoming depressed and paranoid (yes, I have those curses). I lose all the concentration even from the smallest and simplest of things, from life, from food, from everything. At that time, the only thing I feel is that 'I wish, I would have never done that'. But now, there is no way back.
I am not against the word 'sorry', but what pinches and pushes me is the suicidal feeling it brings within you. The feeling that you have committed a blunder. What an a**h*le you are. The guilt, the negativity ruins it all. It's like, 100 good things and 1 bad thing and all is gone. Its more serious and devilish than you think.
Well, to avoid getting into such a crappy situation, do not take chances. At least the ones in which you need to owe a sorry if things get screwed up.Be doubly sure of the things you do, say, write or convey to anyone. Think about the consequences and aftermaths. You just need to be more thoughtful. If you have the slightest of doubt in your mind, take a pause or clarify the doubt and then head forwards. Getting doubts in mind is, what I think, Gods way of telling us 'Don't do it'. You just need to get that call.
And believe me friends, saying sorry is not that beautiful thing. Having said all, what if you have already committed a mistake, already said things which you regret now? Just relax, try to solace with things. Because you cannot live with a tornado in your mind. Sometimes sorry is inevitable. So better clarify it, say a sorry and end it up. And keep in mind, NEVER to commit such mistakes again. Because, doing things wrong once is a mistake and twice is foolishness.
So why do you think I have written this blog? Because I know what foolishness means. :-)
This very smiley denotes that I am totally exhausted by doing coding. I mean, with reference to my earlier blog titled "Do I hate coding?", I would like to say here that I do not actually hate it, but I am tired to do it, taking into consideration probably my incapacity.
I mean seriously guys, when you would read this blog as a third person, you would feel what a loser I am to go hands up in front of the most complex application (technically as well functionally). Because I would do the same. I have had always more than loved coding considering the fact that it gives me a chance to become the DEVELOPER. The creator of something in this world. But sooner, I am afraid to know that I see this feeling diminishing within me. After spending loads and loads of hour on a particular chunk of code just to analyze as simplest thing as deleting a particular record from the table (yeah, it may sound much much simpler) but believe me, it's more complex than even you can think of; I have finally decided to give up.
Analysis sucks. I mean how come I am supposed to analyze a rocket science code when only I have been doing the boat sciences?
PS: It might be a possibility that the things are simpler and I am not able to foresee them clearly due to over work, and may be in due time after the air is cleared, it becomes just a matter of few minutes. Coz I also believe that when things go wrong, they go wrong big time. May be you just need to overcome yourself from this depressing phase of life. The only fear I grudge about is that this phase tends to occur more often in my life now a days. :-)
The former match is gonna be the nerve breaking one, coz probably almost everyone knows the fate of the Bayern – Barca fight.
And then tomorrow we go for much hard core fight with Manchester United facing the fiercely Porto, who to everyones delight provided a shock in the first leg. This is something every Man U fan would look forward for.And who cares about the Gunners and Villa. LOL.
I apologize for the Man U fans for the title itself. I apologize to myself, coz I consider myself a huge Man U fan.
But guys seriously, except the heroic goal from Macheda vs. A Villa, consider Man U's last 4 matches including the UCL. Though Porto were no under dogs, but we deserved to win a goal over them. The game was fantastic no doubt, but a draw???
And what about the earlier two defeats in EPL? If you see the entire game till FT, you will understand the frustration in the team. Ronaldo, not hitting as he used to in the last season. And Tevez missing on a couple of chances too. Do not forget guys, that last season was a flick of luck added to the hard work of the SAF's team. This year though I see the hard work, the stroke of luck is missing. I wonder what would this bring in store for us for UCL as well as EPL.
All I do is pray and watch every match biting my nails and underlining my statistics and observation. But to be frank, I won't be more than surprised if Man U misses to win the cup this season taking into consideration Liverpool's exotic form. (not to forget the smashing slap Hiddink's Chelsea gave to Rafa…. Wow…… I more than loved it ….)
Glory Glory Man Utd. :-) {Wow!! What a diversion from the title of this blog to this line ;-)}
After all a true fan never betrays,
Whether the team wins or loses.
; coz form is temporary, but class is permanent. Guys, please don't freak out if you see the same punch line in my yet-to-come blog about Sachin Tendulkar.
Looking forward to the 2nd leg as well as Sunderland, Wigan and Tottenham.
